By Claralynn Schnell of Contemporary VA
Recently I took part in a parenting class so that I could learn different skills and have an idea of how to do things a little better with my kids.  The message of the entire 6 week class was are we experience rich and relationship poor.  Meaning, are we too worried about the experiences we are having with our children and those around us that we are not taking the time to build relationships. As parents we tend to want to give our kids everything that we didn’t have…while keeping the amazing things we did have at bay.

Here is a great example.  Growing up, we did not take big vacations, there wasn’t the money or the need.  However, many of my friends were constantly going to Hawaii, or Europe or on cruises.  That just was not in the budget for my family.  Yet, I never felt left out.  My family literally camped every weekend from May to October.  We enjoyed those times together, the games, the hiking, the racing to put our tents up the fastest, riding our bikes and enjoying the time we had together.  I grew up in a relationship rich and experience poor environment.  Yet, as a parent, I am always worried that I am not giving my kids enough “experiences” in their lives.  Mind you my kids are 4 and 2, so there is plenty of time, however, I have started to take an active role in ensuring that they are relationship rich.

I want the people around me to leave an afternoon of just talking, playing games, eating a meal with the feeling that they have just gone on a great vacation.  I want to build memories that will last a life time, versus attempting a week vacation to Disneyland.  (Don’t worry, they will go to Disney!)  My point is this…are we in a rush to place our kids in all of these great activities (dance, karate, etc) that we are failing to get to know our children? That we are failing to eat dinner as a family? That our life is so scheduled that we can’t even take a day to lay in our pajamas and watch movies?

The greatest question to ask is…are you relationship poor and experience rich? If so, you won’t have a relationship with your children when they are older.  You must build that relationship now, to ensure a lasting and meaningful relationship.
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